AVPR: Requim
February 22, 2008
"Alien vs. Predator: Requim"
2007, directed by Colin & Greg Strause
Has there ever been an instance in which two popular franchises met in a film and exceeded their individual efforts? Let me answer that question for you: No. That the most recent efforts of the "Alien" and "Predator" series' set the bar fairly low (and the first "Alien vs. Predator" film basically dropped the bar on the ground and left it there), it's hard to imagine this twice removed needless sequel being anything that even resembles "good." And it's not. Not by any measure. Combining the plots of some recent sci-fi action blockbusters (notably the "Resident Evil" films) using what I suspect is some sort of computer program (Adobe Plotmaker, perhaps), the film provides everything you would expect it to. The characters are bland caricatures and there are just enough of them so that you never really care when they die. The plot provides a barely tenable string between the action sequences, which are so few and far between that the movie never gains any kind of momentum. When there is action, it happens in such a confusing blur that the movie is robbed of even its most basic potential pleasure, and subsequently the whole thing lacks any worth. Overall, the film is a turd, but worse yet, it's a boring turd.
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